inselberg
female, 38 |
writing
my hometown / United States
member since 23.05.2004
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I love music, books, movies.
"A Day in the Life"
My fingers ache today from the thoughts running through them cause today was a day when the ideas scale through my life and drive me to the peaks of mountains, but i love it there because i feel real high in that altitude. And the pain in my ring finger is the only thing I have been missing. My tendons ache from the ideas in them and they bark at me all day when I crack the knuckles and they sing and return me to the keys that offer my relief. And I type on about the things I have seen through the day making it all okay, because today I planted a tree and what else is there. Earth was brown and red and black, and thick with moisture in the depths. But at the surface there were cracks and the ideas slipped out. A sigh was heard when the roots met the soil because something always has to give and relief comes in letting things grow. Six hands, two hurting and humans still give back. I don't fear what the earth will do to me because I feel her anger all around, but when I kneel down and listen to the worms I am not afraid of what is below me. Above the boughs bend in the wind and I have made a new friend of bark, branches, leaves and photosynthesis, and I feel myself grow. I won't let it fade, these moments I make that sing and lead me like the pipers pipe to what I know and what they don't. Grow and grow and grow. And on the song goes to another place and sense stops making itself to me, but I don't care because this is life and what I have been givin. I can't take it back or make a refund on the things I didn't want. And I remember my fingers ache at the knuckles, and my ring finger is clawing up but it wants to give me the words I feel. But I can't take it back and I wouldn't for the world and all that is has led me to with no regrets and my fingers still ache from the life I live and have known. But if I am arthritic I don't care because the sighs in my soul sound like the clicking of keys and that is fine with me. I may be buried in front of this computers gaze and my fingers may become gnarled in a grotesque way, but this is me and my relief. Did I say I planted a tree today, like an idea in the earth, maybe it will grow and grow and grow. And on a park bench I thought again as I watched the smoke curl through the setting sun shining through the cracks in the leaves. Mist fell down on me and it hurt to hold that cigarette because my fingers ached and ached and ached. And from that bench I lifted and ran with the wind through the trees for a bit, escaping the world for a while. But I landed on my bench safely as usual smiling for the bronze children in the fountain and I watched the water cascade off them and the damp and chilly air made my fingers ache. And I thought of the tree growing on FallView Lane and what it meant to me. But, the aching in my hands called me home again and I got on my bike and rode the distance to my tree house and climbed the steps and put my thoughts on a shelf, because I don't think when my fingers ache, they do it all on their. But the only thing I can remember now is the tree in the soil, the ideas in that and what it feels like to grow and grow and grow, my mind never stops.
I love indy films and am a David Sedaris fan.
Also am a Clockwork Orange fan, not the edited American version, but the true British version. My droogies, the book is real horrorshow.
I love the Postal Service, Indigo Girls, the Shins, Franz Ferdinand, Polyphonic Spree, Billy Holiday, Ani Difranco, Bright Eyes, discovering new music. Sometimes letting go of the old is the key to the present.
I love my friends, I love life, I love laughter (the most important of them all), and I love each and every day I can still breath!
"Standing at the door to the basement apartment I notice that it has begun to snow, the first snowfall of the season. Snow is great that way, the first snowfall of the season and you look at the world as though you'd never seen it before, as if you had forgotten such a thing was possible." -David Sedaris
P.S. I am a lesbian! |
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